True Meaning of Easter (Part 2)

So in this part, we discuss the real reason why Easter is so important. But first, a little history behind the person that represents Easter. Really, he's the whole reason for Easter. When people say "Easter", they think of this guy...

The Easter Bunny. What’s up with him? Where did that come from? Who thought it was a good idea to have an Easter Bunny carry Easter Eggs? Wouldn’t it have made more sense to have an Easter Chicken? I can’t help but think about those funny Cadberry commercials where there were different animals auditioning as the Easter Bunny. But of course, no animal could be the original clucking Easter bunny. So again, using my vast powers of research (Google), here’s how the Easter bunny came to be.

So according to this site, Easter Bunnies, like most wierd icons, come from pagan lore. Back then, bunnies were considered the most fertile animal (Haven't you heard of the term, breeding like bunnies?). And around the time of spring, all the flowers start blooming, and trees start having leaves. All in all, it was a very fertile season in a festivy sort of way. So what better way to represent spring than, you guessed it, bunnies! Not only that, but they're cute and cuddly and best of all they don't make any sounds when you skin them. You know, to make Sunday Clothes. Anyway, since back then there wasn't any daycare center for the kids, the parents needed another way to get their kids to behave while they're out... paganing. Since it worked for Christmas, why not Spring time? So they told the kids if they behave, this magical bunny will give them presents. And what are those presents? You guessed it! Xbox360s! Oh, wait, no that's my wish. I mean, eggs of course! And now you know why kids didn't behave back then, I mean, who wants crappy eggs as a present? Well, eventually the German Protestant group, most likely the Quakers, brought this tradition to America. And now, we pay people to wear these very hot and uncomfortable bunny outfits and give out colored crap, err I mean eggs.

Growing up in a small non-denominational Church, we never celebrated Good Friday. I mean, every friday is good friday right? TGIF? Tis Good it's Friday, or something. When is there ever a bad Friday? Friday is basically the start of the weekend. At my old High School, everyone left School at 12:30 on Friday. I don't really work on Fridays now either. For that matter, our company has beer busts every Friday. And you have never lived until you try coding while drunk. People go out on Friday nights, that's the number one date night. So, when I first heard about Good Friday, I thought, big deal. Well... for some churches, it is a big deal. It wasn't until my college church that I learned it was the day of Jesus' crucifixition. It was basically another Sunday Morning Service, but on a Friday, and instead of morning, it was night. Hrm... so maybe it's not exactly like a Sunday Morning Service. Moving on... there weren't any plays or crucifixition reenactments, like we do for Christmas. We just filed in, sat in the pews and listened to the pastor talk about the meaning and importance of Good Friday. And where does it stop? There's also Maundy Thursday. Palm Sunday happens the Sunday before. Ash Wednesday. All we need now are 2 cool names for Monday and Tuesday and we got the whole thing covered! Oh wait, my research assistant just came with some news.... apparently there is something for Tuesday. Shrove Tuesday. C'mon people! Won't someone think of Monday? He's so alone and left out and people hate him anyway. Can't someone donate a name for him?

And if you are Catholic, boy, I feel sorry for you this week. It's Holy Week! Wait...that didn't sound right. Well, anyway, for most Catholics, during Holy Week, it's no meat or poultry for the entire week. During Lent, which starts on Ash Wednesday, 46 days prior (but Catholics call it 40 days, cause Sundays don't count for Lent... I dunno why, they just don't), Catholics can't eat any meat on Fridays, and they're required to sacrifice something during the season. I'm not going to talk about the spirit of things in this column, suffice to say, most Catholics don't really enjoy this season. Anyway, for the home stretch, they can't eat meat for the rest of this week until Easter Sunday, where all Catholics (okay, most) can be found at the nearest buffet with plates stacked high with roast beef and chicken. Makes me glad I'm Protestant. Ya know, I used to love tempting my Catholic college friends during Lent. Only one friend and I were non-Catholics out of my group of 6 and it just happened that we shared an apartment. And every Friday, the whole group would always hang out at our place, because we had the biggest TV and actual furniture and the only playstation. For dinner, before the group came to hang out, we would always have Meatloaf, or Hamburger Helper at our place, and the smell of cooked meat would pervade the whole apartment. Of course, we'd always offer them our leftovers, and it was quite fun watching them salivate. Ahh... good times...

So, what have we learned about Easter? Kids hate to wear their best clothes, and why bother cause they’re going to be dirty anyway. Kids don’t really care what you say during Sunday School. Easter eggs are nasty to eat, but fun to collect. Easter bunnies bring the Easter eggs, much like Santa Claus brings Christmas toys. Catholics become healthier but just for this season. Oh yeah, and I think this day has something having to do with a guy coming out of a cave or something. Resurrection? What’s that? =)